Game Impressions: Portal

Wow, I completely forgot to publish this. Whoopsies!
 *rewinds 1 week ago*
 These posts won't exactly be "reviews", but kind of "impressions". Usually upon posting I wouldn't have finished the game (ideally within the range of the beginning/middle "acts") and I won't give a numeric score. Instead, I'll just talk about what I see, what I've heard before playing, and just my general impressions. I won't go too deep into the game itself (talking in detail about gameplay, plot, etc), it won't be professional at all, and all spoilers will be avoided when possible. Think of it like talking to friends about a game you've played.

I said I was going to start this series with Assassin's Creed or Drakengard, but let's just say that I would rather start it with a more positive note (I guess that would be a spoiler for those two if I ever end up doing them). So why not start with a game that honestly has enough of a fan following and annoying internet memes that it doesn't need my praise (...more spoilers)? That game would be Portal. TAR might hurt me lol.

Portal was originally part of The Orange Box package by Valve, holding Half-Life 2 (+ ep 1 and 2), Team Fortress 2, and Portal. Considering most of the retail prices have it around $30, that seems like a fair deal. 3 games that can sit by themselves for $10. Many single games that are twice that price couldn't even stand on their own feet. I've heard of the memes, reviews, some stuff on "Extra Credits", saw the odd "cutscene" (...I'll admit it, I saw the potato cutscene in Portal 2 and was instantly sold) and was interested. I don't know much about the other two, but I know they're shooters and they honestly don't appeal to my stubborn platformer mind. Portal was a puzzle game, which I'm also not interested in (on average. I mean, hell I love Ico) but something about it seemed charming. Was it the strange sense of humor, innovations in physics, the fact that we can rub it in the face of critics of the artistic approach to games, or the promise of cake that I was attracted to? I'm not sure, but that cake sounds great (though apparently it's a lie *shot*).

I bought Portal over Steam last week as a celebration for surviving the fake Apocalypse. Other than all that stuff I said before, I was a clean slate coming in. A clean slate that was very bad at puzzle games (again, except for Ico, but then again it was a puzzle PLATFORMER so maybe that instinct took over in place of my crappy puzzle skills). It was very quick to the game without any cutscenes or even text tutorials except reminders for button operation. At first it seemed like a "baptism of fire" tossing you into into a battle of...portals, but the game was quite considerate. The basic idea of Portal is to get to the end by utilizing your portal gun (to create portals), items, and buttons. There are many hazards like water, energy pellets, and (strangely adorable) gun turrets among many environmental hazards. All of this is overseen by the lab's super-computer called GLaDOS, who eventually promises you cake upon completion (FUCK YES CAKE!). There are no cutscenes, your character (Chell) is silent and can only be seen by looking at yourself through portals, and the "plot" progresses through gameplay.

To sum up my experiences, I have to say that this is the only (...non-Ico) puzzle game I've enjoyed. The levels are really planned out well and have a nice flow to them and the difficulty curve is PERFECT. I'm going back to the tutorials for a moment, since it seems almost every positive feeling I have about the gameplay stems from the use of tutorials. Fact of the matter is, the game feels like one big tutorial. Every level prepares you for a later puzzle. The first few puzzles are sickeningly easy (walk through the portal, put cube here, etc), but are made to make you confident and have practical use of these skills through experimentation. Then you get a few harder ones like playing with momentum (a key skill to master) and avoiding hazards. I had to pause/quit for difficulty very few times, and usually then after I took a break I would figure it out after some thought. My time is hideously slow, though sympathize with me as this is my first try, I'm going 100% blind, and I generally suck at most puzzles. I'm getting towards the end of the game and things are getting really intense (for one thing, I haven't found any cake yet). I won't spoil the plot, but let's just say GLaDOS has earned my respect in being among the greatest video game villains ever (no, it's not completely cake related but it would be nice. Ok, I'll stop saying "cake" for a week to make up for the shameless meme riding I've been doing).

To summarize, Portal is great. If you want a cheap, short game that has the weight of a retail one, this is perhaps the best you're going to get. It's a little dodgy for controls (*coughjumping*), but the experience is unmatched. It's $10 over Steam and it doesn't require a gaming computer to play at decent performance. It's funny, the levels and physics are creat, and it's a hell of a lot of fun...most of the time.

Oh, sidenote, Psychonauts is also on Steam cheaply. After you finish grovelling at Tim Schafer's feet in forgiveness for not buying it before, BUY IT NOW!

And if you excuse me, I'm off to do some science...by which I mean AMVs since it has been nearly a year since TCT started and Possk is being sloooooooooow.